April 14, 2008 - 14:11
News: Colorado

Top 10 Republican mediocrities in the Colorado legislature

1) Ted Harvey- SD30

In the last 18 months, this self-described American “hero” has gone from state representative to state senator to congressional candidate. As the Sanjaya of the GOP lineup, however, his theatrics (or his hair) won’t be able to carry him where substance is required.

2) Ken Summers- HD22

This charter school advocate has been notably absent in 2008, sponsoring legislation on license plates and voter ids (which has failed previously).

3) Dave Schultheis- SD9

Schultheis follows in the small shadow cast by his predecessor in the 9th SD, Doug Lamborn. This mini-me version of Lamborn votes like his mentor, but lacks Lamborn’s intellect, if that’s possible, even if they both share the social skills of Doug Bruce.

4) Steve Johnson- SD15

A state office holder since 1997, Johnson has a mighty slim record of accomplishment. His view on Darwin’s theory of evolution (as a physician, he’s against it) is about the only thing that distinguishes him.

5) Victor Mitchell- HD45

Elected in 2006, Mitchell has accomplished next to nothing legislatively, except a bill that would attach tracking bracelets to people with disabilities. Undoubtedly, Mitchell has enjoyed a stellar business career. He’s just one in a long line of people who have found that business success and government success call for different skills. Mitchell announced he won’t be running for re-election.

6) Stella Garza-Hicks- HD17

Garza Hicks was appointed after Mark Cloer resigned to “spend more time with the family.” And in 2007 she got late bill status on one bill after introducing no legislation up to that point. ’08 has been a little better, but not much. Mercifully, she will not run for re-election in 2008.

7) Bob Gardner- HD21

A better activist than legislator, Gardner has figured out that it’s easier to talk about getting stuff done than actually doing it. Most of his legislation has died in committee for the very good reason that he’s in the minority. But an underlying reason could also be that he’s been an activist for so long he’s missing on the give and take necessary to legislate.

8) Larry Liston- HD16

Liston was anything but mediocre when calling unwed parents “sluts.” In fact that one comment threatened to eliminate him from this list. But on balance we decided that someone who slept through committee hearings (on his own bills) did just enough to warrant inclusion here on a list that requires you to do very little.

9) Mike May- HD44

We can’t think of anyone less fit to be a minority leader than May. Generally the position calls for backbone; whereas May seems to back up most of the time. He first favored a candidate in the presidential race who received fewer votes in Colorado than even Fred Thompson did. Then he jumped on the Romney wagon, hoping to make it up to the GOP. But it was too late. Romney dropped out a week later.

10) Andy McElhany- SD12

Ok, so we were wrong. We thought of another guy not fit to be a minority leader. Here’s another Republican who slept in committee hearings. However, McElhany slept while his own witness was testifying. Wow. We won’t say what he was doing with his thumb and his nose. It’ll be quite some time before the Republicans regain the upper hand with leaders like that. Or maybe McElhany can be Prime Minister one day.

Wally Edge can be reached via email at noreply@politicker.com.

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